Love of Family

I was sitting here thinking about my family the one that God Gave me from the moment I entered this life. There is noting like family and the memory's that we create here on earth are what we will take with us. Today was a Hard day. We have made the decision as a family to put my mom into a 24hr hospice facility. There are so many things that I wanna let my mom know So much I still wanna share and so much I want her to be there for. I cant Say goodbye to her not now. I want more time I want her to see all her Grandchildren I want her to be happy and not in pain. This Time has been very hard on all of us emotionally we are Drained and are looking for the light at the end of a dark and lonely tunnel. Please Keep my Family in your prayers.

Life

Life never turns out how we think it should and sometimes we don't react to things the way others think we should either. Sometimes I think we learn more about ourselves when we go through rough times. I know God said that it would not be an easy life but it would be worth it. But Why does it have to be so hard sometimes. Seems Like some of my Family understands that I am sick myself and Each day is different for me Being diabetic is not fun and lately my blood sugars have been high. Today they were 274 and they are not supposed to be over 130 Stress can bring them up to, witch is not good when they are up I get an upset stomach and get dizzy easy among other things. I have tried to explain to my family that I am not in any condition to take care of someone who is sick like my mom when I am ill myself. But only a few understand the Rest yell at me and Throw mean words at me. I am not supposed to be under any stress the doctor told me if I am under stress I need to walk away for two Reasons I am diabetic and have high blood pressure. They just Don't get it! I don't know how to make them Understand. Their actions and words are just pushing me away. Just because I cannot take care of my mom Does not mean I don't love her. I know I cannot make them understand but God can. I am under so much stress I just cannot take anymore!

Overwhelmed

I feel like the picture above overwhelmed and over stimulated! With all the chaos that is going on around Our move and over my moms health. It seems like my desire to get packed has up and left and there is still much to do and not enough Hours in the day. I have been sleeping more lately I think I am getting depressed. I need prayer that I can Get through this Dry time in my life I feel like I have been hit by a wrecking ball. My mom is back in the hospital after being Released Tuesday, she was not even out for a whole day she has some sort of infection that resists medication and they said her liver is shutting down. My family is angry with me because I have not been there as much. How am I supposed to be 2 places at once. :'( Yes my mom is important to me but Dave cannot move it all himself. I don't know what to do. We move this Saturday. I have been packing and going to see her when I can. she has also became violent towards my family hitting my sisters and dad. They say when her ammonia levels are high she becomes someone else basically, not herself. Please pray for my family through this very difficult time that God would carry us all.

You can say that Again.

Yeah so My life has been kinda Crazy lately. My mom has been in and out of the hospital since her fall. Just when it seemed she was making progress she slipped backwards. My sister Stephanie called her Last week I wanna say it was Sunday to talk to her and she was not making any sense. She was scheduled to go home the day before but all of us had said we didn't think she was ready as she cannot take care of herself let alone go to the restroom on her own. Well in any case the Dr decided it was best for her to stay put. Then on Sunday she Started talking funny on the phone and was repeating herself. We all met at the Rehab center to see her and decided that we wanted her to Go to the Hospital. After some tests they found that her Ammonia levels were elevated that can cause you to do off the wall things and not be yourself. Also she has Cefis - It's an infection in the bowel, They say she also has an infection in her urinary tract & some sort of infection in her sinus. When she first got to the hospital her ammonia level was 60 a normal ammonia level is 30. The next day they were 130. After that they seem to come down but yesterday they were up again to 90. Her short term memory is not working well she seems to forget things you told her 5 min's ago. My older sister Bonnie has talked to the Dr and he says that all the treatments that they have tried are not working. She gets agitated very easily and isn't sleeping. We are in the process of moving and with all this it's been a little stressful on Dave and I. But more so for my sister Bonnie as she has been there for my mom more than I have. Please pray for strength for the family Thur our hours and days of need. I dont know how much more we can take.

is it over yet?

Yeah I think I have seen enough boxes to last forever! We have been packing and moving and it's not over yet!! We have until the end of the month to get it all out! It seems like I have way to much stuff in this small place! Garage sell time! So if I don't return phone call or email's it's not because I am ignoring you it's because I have been busy packing and by the time the night rolls around, I am exhausted and want sleep so I have been going to bed earlier than normal. On another note, Please pray for my friend Bethany Hutchins I just found out that her Father passed away. He had Found out he had Cancer and was Receiving treatment for it. Please pray for her mom Marilyn and all the kids & extended family. I have known Bethany & her family for several years. They are Good people and my Heart aches for them.

We are so Excited!

Well I went over to the house today and the painter was there he said he should be done painting tonight or early tomorrow morning. I am Getting so excited I can hardly contain my excitement any longer!! I am surprised I can even sleep at night. We have lived in apartments since we got married in 2002 6 years of apartments is enough for me. I keep thinking about how I am going to decorate it what I am going to put where and so on I cant wait to have it all put together. So this week we will be moving stuff over we have to be out of the apartment by the end of may so that is plenty of time! I feel so blessed to be able to move into a house. Things have just worked out and I feel Like God's finger prints are all over this. Thank you lord for this opportunity.

KEYS!!!

Today was a Good Day as far as Sundays Go, God is Good. We Got the keys to the house today so the Excitement is mounting more and more. We can only put things in the Garage for the time being. They still need to get the Carpet cleaned and some things painted inside! but we are Drawing closer to being able to move in. We are renting with the option to buy If we like the house and the neighborhood. I am thinking about having My pastor say a prayer over the house. What do you think? does that sound Strange? I cant wait to get it just how I want it paint and all.